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Anger is an emotion just like the rest: sadness, joy, or excitation, but anger, unlike the rest, has a potent charge. Sometimes, anger feels impossible to contain. While angry outbursts feel justified at the moment, they may make the people in our lives equally angry and turn a disagreement into a screaming match. Or we may throw and break things and hurt others emotionally, psychologically, or physically. Our anger or rage may cause others to fear us and withdraw from us physically or emotionally. Anger is such an intoxicating emotion that it can feel exhilarating or thrilling to express it. Still, its unchecked expression can leave us feeling ashamed of ourselves and, ultimately, drive us to feel alone and unloved.
Aggression may also take on a less obvious role in our life. If we are perpetually grumpy or irritable, we may have issues with appropriately expressing our anger. While not as obvious as the vein-popping, eye-bugging rager, this form of aggression is just as harmful to ourselves and others. Instead of exploding a moment, our moodiness slowly drains the vitality away from ourselves and our relationships and ultimately leaves us feeling ashamed and hopeless about our internal world.
While it is always good to recognize our anger feelings, it is not always beneficial to act it out. We can't control the world or people or even our emotions about either, but we can control how we respond to our own anger. Successful anger management begins with the recognition of how and when we begin to grow angry. Listening to our body's subtle communications makes us capable of responding to a difficult situation before we grow enraged or resentful. Instead of piling more fuel onto the fire, we allow the flames to slowly extinguish themselves.
The second important aspect of anger management is the deliberate choice to change our internal feelings and thoughts through external means. Perhaps we learn some relaxation exercises and breathing or just remove ourselves from difficult circumstances or interactions. Or change our focus for a moment. Relaxing our body and mind can go far in diffusing our anger.
Lastly, once we're calm and collected, we become curious about the roots of our anger. Oftentimes, we respond to a situation with anger because we were taught by our parents, community, or culture that anger is the appropriate response. We have a lot of anger inside us, not because of the present but because of past injustices or wounds. If we can ask ourselves, "Why do I feel so Angry so often?" Oftentimes, we can find a meaningful answer. A better understanding of our own mind and our own past gives us the foundation to change our behaviors.
Psychotherapy with me offers you an opportunity to learn new anger management skills while also building your understanding of your own mind. This understanding leaves you not only less angry but more peaceful and less alone.
Aggression may also take on a less obvious role in our life. If we are perpetually grumpy or irritable, we may have issues with appropriately expressing our anger. While not as obvious as the vein-popping, eye-bugging rager, this form of aggression is just as harmful to ourselves and others. Instead of exploding a moment, our moodiness slowly drains the vitality away from ourselves and our relationships and ultimately leaves us feeling ashamed and hopeless about our internal world.
While it is always good to recognize our anger feelings, it is not always beneficial to act it out. We can't control the world or people or even our emotions about either, but we can control how we respond to our own anger. Successful anger management begins with the recognition of how and when we begin to grow angry. Listening to our body's subtle communications makes us capable of responding to a difficult situation before we grow enraged or resentful. Instead of piling more fuel onto the fire, we allow the flames to slowly extinguish themselves.
The second important aspect of anger management is the deliberate choice to change our internal feelings and thoughts through external means. Perhaps we learn some relaxation exercises and breathing or just remove ourselves from difficult circumstances or interactions. Or change our focus for a moment. Relaxing our body and mind can go far in diffusing our anger.
Lastly, once we're calm and collected, we become curious about the roots of our anger. Oftentimes, we respond to a situation with anger because we were taught by our parents, community, or culture that anger is the appropriate response. We have a lot of anger inside us, not because of the present but because of past injustices or wounds. If we can ask ourselves, "Why do I feel so Angry so often?" Oftentimes, we can find a meaningful answer. A better understanding of our own mind and our own past gives us the foundation to change our behaviors.
Psychotherapy with me offers you an opportunity to learn new anger management skills while also building your understanding of your own mind. This understanding leaves you not only less angry but more peaceful and less alone.